My Crowning Glory?

Growing up I never felt like I belonged in my culture, my community, the kids I was suppose to be friends with at CCD. By the time I turned 9, I hid behind a shy complex, pretending that the world scared me, so I could avoid going to the Portuguese Club on a Friday night, so I could stay at my god sister's house instead of attending a family event, that consisted more of just people that were related to me. But even those who were, are, related to me I tried to avoid. 

For such a long time, I felt like I did not belong to my culture, my community. I felt like i was in the skin of someone else. Skin that was dried out, too tight, and ready shed. This was mostly the result of the bullying that went on in CCD classes and Portuguese school, all because I didn't live in the same towns that the other kids did. They thought I was the weird because my parents chose to live in Linden, instead of Elizabeth. But I have learned that I do belong in my nationality. I guess that skin I felt so uncomfortable in was waiting for me to grow into a strong independent woman, ready to take on a matriarchal role when the time was right. 

I know that parents raise their kids in different ways. But I have learned that those children that made me feel like an I was an inadequate Portuguese child, were being raised to follow and never to lead or at least that is what I tell myself. I look back now, still seeing some of those same kids at the Portuguese Club or family events and now it's myself who is succeeding. Whose is taken under the wing of the wise being taught the secrets of the culture, learning to stand tall, head up, and shoulders back. I am being readied for the monarchy and they are all standing on the sidelines watching. I like to live by this quote "Be kind to unkind people. Sometimes they need it the most." 

If you don'y know by now what my nationality is shame on you! I have mentioned it a few times already!! I am Portuguese. My parents and my grandparents were born and raised in Portugal. If you're wondering if my parents met in their home country, the answer is no. Ironically, they met at a disco club in the town that my dad's parents' settled down in here in America. A town I often refer to as home, Elizabeth. The club my parents met at stills stand proudly on Route 1&9.       

  My Mother's Side              

My great grandmother on my mom's mother side, was from Sicily and fell in love with a Portuguese man, who was  in town on business and she chose to marry him and follow him to Portugal. My great-grandfather on my mom's dad's side is from Iceland though his story is not very clear, I know that his whole family moved to Portugal. All his siblings  built houses near his and their kids live next door to my grandpa till this day.

Other than that the details have been lost to burnt churches and lack of record keeping. My family and I have tried to track down my great-grandmothers family through Italy, but we have been unsuccessful till this day. 

In a very taboo, 21st century way, my maternal grandparents met at a butcher shop because that is where my grandfather worked. They started a unapproved courtship and my grandmother was pregnant at 19 without being married. They have been together ever since. My grandfather fought in the Portuguese Colonial War in Angola and my grandmother held down the fort, aka the Butcher shop, while he was away. 

My Father's Side 

 My dad's grandparents were from Portugal and his family can be traced back through countless generations in the small "town" more like village. His great-greatgrandparents house is still in the family. The coolest part is walking around town, knowing that generations of your past have walked the same dirt roads, up the same mountain trails, that only exist because of how often they are used. My paternal grandparents met each other while they were working in a book factory. My grandmother was being courted by another man at the time and my grandpa was not having it. He personally went to my great-grandfather and listed his reasons as to why HE should be courting my grandma. Well suffice to say, he won. They were married for 53 years, true soul mates if you believe in that stuff. When my grandma passed, we thought my grandpa was going to slip into oblivion as well. He states that the only reason he stuck around was because his grandkids still need him. They still have so much to learn and the only time he smiles these days is when we are around. 

(Left to Right: My dad, my grandma, my grandpa, my Aunt, my uncle)

Finally Me

My family history, experiences and culture have molded me into the person I am today. I am thankful for those kids who made me feel so uncomfortable because they taught me to look for perspective, to learn more about myself and where I come from. I love my family, my relatives and friends.  The people that surround us forever change us, no matter if they only stand by our sides for a short period of time.....

 

                                                  

 

The Pepsi Commercial

           Commercials, tv shows, movies, media in general has been one of the most useful outlets to express displeasure, political out cry and to begin a movement. Yesterday Pepsi released a commercial trying to bridge the gap between police and the general public, taking advantage of the Black Lives Movement protests that have occurred over the past several years. The commercial has caused a controversial uproar bringing the good and the bad in human beings.             This is where I feel like Pepsi differs. In the commercial, Pepsi did a very good job at including diverse populations and races. They had different characters expressing themselves in different ways. My favorite part was not the fact the Kendal Jenner was present and modeling, but rather how she ripped her blonde wig and wiped off her lipstick before joining in the protest that was occurring outside in the streets. So often when we think of white girls, we think blondes who are dressed up and in makeup, doing lucrative work like modeling and then Pepsi has a real life model rip off all those stereotypes before joining in on the movement.  In addition, I want to know why it was Kendal Jenner who handed the white cop a Pepsi, why not have someone of color or a different race? By not sticking to the original story, Pepsi down plays the problems of our society and all the issues we face today.If they were going to do a commercial like this one, then I feel like they should have reviewed all the facts. It just seems that they are trying to make light of a situation that is so serious, especially the part when the muslim woman takes a photo of Jenner and hugs someone else.Did you know that a photographer, Leshia Evans, captured a very similar photo of a 28 year old nurse being detained by police officers in a Black Lives Matter Movement in Baton Rouge, Louisiana.

           Media and large companies have had a history of taking social movements and capitalizing on them. For example, many of us love SNL, but have you ever taken a moment to realize that they too are taking political and social follies, turning them into comedy and capitalizing on them. Instead of helping a movement, creating understanding and awareness, large companies have an outstanding record of using them to benefit.
             The Pepsi commercial is the perfect example. Here they take a protest, a social movement, turn it into a commercial and use it to highlight their product, though Pepsi did so very eloquently. Why this commercial has me asking questions I have never thought about, such as How often do companies do this, Are we seeing these commercials and linking them to the actual movements, despite the unrealistic image painted in the commercial? 
       Maybe instead of having these large companies down play real life problems, we should hold them responsible for not speaking out the truth and make them understand that portraying these serious events in a playful manner is not ok. But then again, who wants realism attached to their product? 

A Year Filled With Accidents

     

      I currently intern for Crossroads Theatre Company in downtown New Brunswick. I have been there for two semesters and have encountered a lot of people who do not understand why I am there. I have had the ability to meet many influential theatre folk who have no problem giving out advice that nobody truly wants. 

      The hardest part is when they ask you what your major is at Rutgers.  As they go down the line of immaculate dressed interns, all reply with the same answer, a Theatre Major. When they have exhausted all of the theatre majors they slowly approach the one intern who knows everybody's name and location, who looks like she knows what she is doing. They never bother with the major question when they approach me. Instead they jump right into talking about what their college years where like, which classes I should take and which professors I should avoid. This literally happens to me at LEAST 6 times a week. And as they not so quickly wrap up their life story and college experience, they ask about what plans I have for my future.(Just to clue you guys in, apparently as a Theatre Major, you have to make and present a 10 year plan for a mandatory class you take).

        At first, it was difficult to find words to explain that this is not at all what I saw my future looking like. As the seconds ticked one, their eyes began to fill with questioning and as I finally shattered the silence with my "I want to go to medical school," they faces jump up in surprise. Eyebrows almost touching their hairline, mouth looking like it just ate something sour. And finally they ask me, what my major is.

        I respond with Biology, it always freaks them out when I do. HEHE. I continue on with my accident story. How I accidentally got thrown into Theatre Appreciation because the class I was in before got canceled. How it just so happened that my professor Marshall Jones was offering internships to his students and I randomly decided to get up and go for it. And how I was invited back for a second semester and got accidentally assigned to work as a Productions Assistant because ours quick one day before the show. My favorite part is the look of horror on their faces as I explain my situation. It's the same face everybody I have met at Crossroads looks at me when I maticualsy tell the story. 


        Sometimes though it get better, because said person will stand their and argue that nothing about Theatre is accidental. But rest assured, I am.

ObSESSed

         Obsession is a dangerous hobby, forever haunting our dreams and seeping into every aspect of our lives. Obsession though dangerous is one of the best motivators in this world. Who better to push you accomplish greatness than something so dark and dangerous.

Obsession
      -Noun
1.the domination of one's thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, image, desire, etc.

       My to-do list dominates my thoughts and mind whenever I have enough time to write one. I feel like I am always thinking about what's next and never really focusing on what's happening now. I tend to lose myself in the details. Always reciating what my next activity to do is. Take for example this blog, right now I am at Sarah Sings A Love Story working the show as a productions assistant and all I can think about is how I HAVE to finish this blog, make it perfect. It's weird to realize that my obsession with To-do lists is a hinderance at times. Maybe it is time to start working on getting hooked on a new idea. 

2.the idea, image, desire, feeling, etc., itself.
       The idea or desire is in itself an obsession. A peculiar way of thinking about obsession but it's true. Right now I'm obsessing on getting home tonight at 7 30pm and finishing the new novel I began yesterday. Just the idea, is an obsession.
        Binging Netflix is an obsession that we are all too familiar with. 

 
3.the state of being obsessed.

    You know exactly what I'm talking about. The feeling of being so honed in on something. The feeling of complete devotion to whatever you are obsessed with. You know once you start you CANNOT stop. Its a marathon that may never end. The adrenaline rush you get when you've been awake for 72 hours is thrilling, like taking the drop in the high rollercoaster in the world.

How To Get Free Shaken Teavana Refills

Step 1: Download the Starbucks Mobile App!
-If you didn't know by now, Starbucks has come out with a mobile app which allows you to purchase drinks ahead of time and gain reward stars. To gain reward stars, you must make your Starbucks purchase with your phone. If you are afraid to link your card to your cell phone, Starbucks offers an alternative. You can purchase a gift card and upload the gift card onto your phone. When you run out of money on your gift card, you can go back into starbucks and refill it, with as much or as little as you want.

Step 2:Reach Green Level Status

-While this sounds expensive, Starbucks makes it really easy for members to earn free drinks and achieve Green Level status. Starbucks rewards has 2 levels Green Level status which is 0-299 reward stars earned and Gold Level status which is 300+ reward stars. When you first register for the mobile app, everybody starts off at Green Level status. Part of the benefits that come with just having the mobile app are free in store refills. What this means is that you can get free refills for any handshakes teavana drink or any plain coffee drink order.

Step 3:Learn How to Smartly Abuse the System

-Unfortunately, Starbucks has a in-store refill policy only, which pretty much means that they will only give you a free refill with the app if you stay in store. But a majority of Starbucks employee's don't care about that rule. They DO NOT have the time to make sure you stayed in the store for  a refill. So, if you leave Starbucks and come back in store to grab a refill. Make it look like you know how the system works. 

             1. Look busy on your phone like your doing work. 

             2. When you ask for a refill, ask with confidence. Ask like you have done this before and         know exactly how this works

Step 4: ENJOY YOUR FREE REFILL!!!!!

Lessons Learned, Memories Treasured

       Home, home isn't a place, home are the people you are with that mean something to you. Linden, the place I have lived a majority of my life now has a soft spot in my heart, despite all the hatred I held for it growing up. From the moment I turned ten until I was 17, i walked to school every single day. I have found that those sometimes 20- 30 minute walks to and from school shaped me in ways that only the roads and its silent warnings and prayers can teach you. Every morning, way before the sun rose in the sky to greet us hello, my feet where already on the pavement. Sometimes the fog would roll in and make the playgrounds look like abandoned cemeteries that held nothing but broken dreams and promise. The winter months where the harshest, blizzard snows blinded you like a sunny day, every part of your body was an ice cube by the time you got home.

            Regardless of all that, those walks hold some of the best memories and life lessons. Head slightly pointed down, eyes dashing in all directions, keep your ears open and make sure you have both hands in your pocket. One gripping on to a cell phone ready to dial 911, the other with your keys between your fingers, just in case. I would always walk with my headphones in, the volume was always on mute. I learned how to detect if somebody was walking behind me and I soon learned that there are strength in numbers. By the time I reached middle school, a large portion of my friends all walked home and lived near me, so we would all walk together in one large group, sometimes I feel like the soccer moms picking up their kids from the elementary school, felt we were a mob ready to destroy their children. My best memories come from walking to and from school with my friends throughout middle and high school. I remember all the times we would help the fragile old lady on Sunny Side Drive carry her groceries in the house. We sometimes use to walk down the middle of sleepy streets or race each other to the end of the block.  There was always an extra ear bud laying around or even a shoulder to cry on. Our group, though large in size, was closer than any person could imagine. All of us were from different classifications aka cliches, but that didn't hinder our weird, forever treasured friendship. Our walks turned into impromptu therapy sessions, regulated by nobody but us. We cried, we laughed, and we learned that their was always someone to count on, even if there was nobody there when we got home. We taught each other how to be vulnerable and yet carefree in the way every child should be. Most importantly, we taught each other that family does't have to mean your a blood relative, because while blood is thicker than water, but it's water that washes away fear, tears, and skinned knees.

Interview With the Bestie

Interviewer

Introduce yourself! How are you today? How are classes going?

Raquele

My name is Raquele Strickland. I am 18 years old. I am a freshman at Rutgers University. I dorm on Cook. I'm doing well; my day would be much better if I didn’t have to go to classes.

Interviewer

When you were little, what did you want to be?

Raquele

I wanted to be a doctor when I was little. Cliché I know, especially if you consider how much I hate Chemistry. I wanted to be a doctor because I wanted to help people like my sister. Her and me would always play fight when we were younger, and I would always hurt her because if my nails. So, I came up with the idea to be a doctor. That way I could help her and not get in trouble with my mom for hurting her.

Interviewer

OMG! I use to fight with my sister like that all the time and to be honest I still do. Ok, next question. Who do you think should run for president in two years?

Raquele

Brad Pitt should be running for president because he is a good actor with good looks and an incredible background. What! Don’t look at me like that, you know you want him as president too!

Interviewer

Sure, whatever you say Rocky. What’s the best book you’ve read so far this year? Ever?

Raquele

This year the best book I’ve read is Tom’s River because it was so relatable to my life. The setting of the book really resonates with me, as I live in a similar setting. Where I live there is a lot of pollution, I live two blocks from an oil refinery. The book explains a lot about it and all the negative effects it has on humans and the environment. The best book I have EVER read is The Undiscovered Self because a psychologist wrote it and it always kept me wanting for me, if that makes sense.

 Interviewer

Ya, that makes sense to me. It sounds like the book, keeps you interested in your self and how you are always changing. And while society and the social standards for women might mess with our brains, we should always love who we are and want to be who we are.

Raquele

Exactly!!!

Interviewer

What makes you feel afraid?

Raquele

Mice, they freak me out! They are really ugly and have slithering tails. Ughhh, I'm getting Goosebumps answering this one. The have beady little eyes that stare into my soul in a bad way.

Interviewer

I should have guessed that’s what your answer was going to be. Do you remember the time in French Class, Victor the mouse paid us a visit and you and Madame Foy jumped on top of her giant oak desk, both of you decked out in high heeled boots, screaming at the top of your lungs. It was so funny; especially when Madame Foy kept screaming go away Victor. We had no clue she was talking to the mouse.

Raquele

I completely forgot about that! I can’t believe she named the mouse. They are too disgusting to have names.

Interviewer

OK, now here is a very serious question. Would you rather get lunch with Gillian Flynn or J.K. Rowling?

Raquele

J.K Rowling hands down. What kind of question is that Nicole; you know I will always answer Rowling! She created Hogwarts; it doesn’t get better than that.

Interviewer

Fine. Though can you believe with the amount of books I read, I have never read the Harry Potter series? Oh well, what’s your most embarrassing childhood memory?

Raquele

My most embarrassing childhood memory is when I went on a camping trip with my grandparents and I have to pee behind a tree. I like my privacy and modern technology. A tree does not offer that.

Interviewer

If you had the option of adopting a baby fox or baby koala, which one would you choose?

Raquele

Baby Koala hands down. They are so adorable and cling to you. I love to cuddle, so it would be perfect.

Interviewer

What’s your dream job?

Raquele

To be a botanist at NASA. For you people out there who don’t know what I'm talking about, a botanist is a scientist that specializes in plants. And for the rest of you shaking your head, saying I have no future, watch me succeed.

Interviewer

Well, look on the positive side. If you ever got stuck on Mars, like Matt Damon, you wouldn’t die of hunger.  Who is your favorite mythological god/goddess?

Raquele

Artemis or Hades, I favor them both. I love my dark, dreamy men. Actually, my first crush was a boy names Alex in elementary school. He was a Spanish dream.

Interviewer

That is ironic, considering that your now dating a polish dream named Alex. I wonder what Alex would say to here that you’ve had a crush on another Alex.

If you had to choose between using Internet Explorer forever, or permanently using an AOL e-mail address, which one would it be?

Raquele

It would have to be a freaking AOL e-mail address. Internet Explorer would drive me insane.

Interviewer

 If you could either be a duck or an owl, which would you be?

Raquele

An owl, because they can turn their head 270 degrees and I need that to make sure no woman is staring at my man.

Interviewer

What do you love about yourself most?

Raquele

My ability to make conversation is what I love. I can literally start talking to anybody, no problem.

Interviewer

Ya, your randomness helps you in that field.   What don’t you like so much?

Raquele

I don’t like my face. It’s too oily and prone to break outs, especially since I have started living on campus. And I'm not trying to put myself down, I'm just complaining.

Interviewer

Rugrats or Doug?

Raquele

Rugrats, all the way. I still watch them till this day!

Interviewer

Me too!!! Which house would you belong to in Game of Thrones? Like, very honestly.

Raquele

The one with all the blonds, what!?!!? I can’t remember their names.

Interviewer

Regardless, thank you for doing this for me; I owe you some beef jerky.

Raquele

No problem! And you know how much I love my beef jerky!