Self At Home

I grew up and still currently reside in Linden, NJ. If you don’t know where that is, I’ll give you a few clues. It’s considered a city that is filled with political corruption. The bomber that bombed NY and NJ back in September was captured in Linden, just two blocks away from my best friends house. And while the reality of this world terrifies me, I’m glad that it has made it easier to describe where I live.

            Growing up in Linden has taught me a boatload of things. From the moment I entered elementary school until the moment I left high school, all I knew was diversity. I was fortunate enough to attend diverse public schools. It was there that I personally began to truly understand tolerance and equality.

            As young students we were encouraged to participate and learn in other cultural traditions, to help us better understand our classmates and teachers. In high school (I feel so old saying that), the minorities were the majorities and vica versa. It was an amazing, once-in-a-life time experience, which I don’t think I will ever be able to experience again. Everyday I learned about different religions and cultures first hand from my friends, peers and teachers. My French teacher was born and raised in France, which made taking her class that much more of a cultural experience.

            My views and experiences became global and its made me feel culturally diverse. I believe the one thing I lack is visiting all the places and cultures that I have learned about and second-handedly experienced. And while Linden and it’s school system is not the best, the friends I’ve made and the countless life lessons I’ve learned just form being ‘home’ has molded me into the person I am today.

            On that note, I still reside in Linden, but I like to joke around that I reside at Rutgers as well; because of the amount of time I spend on campus and commuting. Rutgers is praised to be one of the most diverse Universities in the United States and I am glad to go to a diverse school, but most of all I am proud to go to a revolutionary one.

            I love history and being at Rutgers, I feel like I am apart of history. Since being at Rutgers, I attended my 1^st protest within the first semester of my freshman year at Rutgers. Rutgers, I believe, is in the process of teaching me some new life lessons, as my partial new home.

            In the end, home is any place in the world, as long as, the people you treasure the most are along for the ride.

Introduction

            Time is a very limited thing; everything dies either slowly or all at once. A very morbid view, I know. But the acknowledgement of death I feel is the first step to truly living, for you can’t truly live if you fear to die. Life is a very precious thing that needs to be held with certain fragility, but yet it needs to be pushed past all its boundaries.

            Time is a very limited thing; I have learned unfortunately. Life can be taken without forewarning, swept away in a flood, torn apart by a twister, one breath in, no breath out. My second semester of freshman year begins the same way my second semester of freshman year did four years ago. Watching and waiting, struggling between patience and frustration at time, at having no solution, at having nothing left to lose because you have lost too much. Watching and waiting as the life slowly drains out of a body. The only difference is four years ago it was a young body, which was able of mind, barely alive long enough to live, was taken away the same way old body will be. Old body filled with life and wisdom, how is not afraid to leave this earth, who has made peace.

            Time is a very limited thing that ahs pushed me outside of many comfort zones. Death, for better or worse, has taught me how to live. What an oxymoron that is! In the past four years, I have conquered more fear than I ever expected. Personally, I am terrified of heights, but only the going up part. Those 55 seconds on Nitro as we slowly clink, clink, clink to the top terrifies the bleep out of me. But once I'm at the top, it’s the greatest feeling and the most freedom I have experienced in my life. Whether its on the top of a rollercoaster, Bunker Hill in Gettysburg, or the highest peak in Portugal, looking around and taking in the beauty that is, in my eyes, only portrayed with height, makes facing my fear worthwhile.

            Time is a limited thing. There is no time to do what you do not love. I am discovering here at Rutgers, the place where I swore I was not going to college, that doing what you love despite not knowing what lies beyond the diploma, should not halt you from pursuing what you love. I am currently a Biological Science major who loves producing theatre, and watching spoken word poetry. One part of me craves a research lab to help me determine the answers to my never ending expansion of questions and if you only have answers left, start finding a new topic to question. The other craves endless amounts of scripts, with never-ending notes being scribbles about and the countless hours poured into one performance.

I love reading. Weirdly, I read the last page of a book to determine if it’s any good. I have this personal theory (there is the scientist in me) that if you cannot determine the storyline of the book based off the last page, then it’s a book worth reading, a book worth my precious time. So in my everyday life I try to break the constraints of time, to capture all that I can of this twisted beautiful life.

P.S. I left some Spoken Word for you guys.